The trouble with most people is that they don’t truly love what they’re creating. Their work is a chore – a means to an end – and they have no dream, no vision. Persevering is painful. Oftentimes, too many other things get in the way. They love the idea of having money, for example, but they don’t love what they’re doing to attract that money. No different are those who dream of getting married and having children, but settle for a partner they don’t passionately desire. It’s the “means” they’re after, and when the marriage fails, they wonder what went wrong.
Moreover, if you don’t love what you’re doing (or who you’re doing it with) you’ll have a very difficult time sustaining what you’ve created. You’ll always be tempted by other opportunities or people, and keeping your focus – honoring your vision – will be extremely challenging.
The reason being: making money, just like loving someone, is merely an exchange of values or energy. Your product, (or you), resonates at a certain frequency to be exchanged with a currency of relative energy. This is the Law of Attraction; and it applies to attracting money, love, friends, opportunity, and so on. This law applies to all people, not just certain individuals. It doesn’t differentiate among nationality, sex, age, or income.
True desire is akin to passion. When you’re truly passionate about something, it becomes effortless to think about it, dream about it, crave it, visualize it, want it, see it, breathe it . . . and then create it. Sir Isaac Newton was once asked how he discovered the law of gravitation, and he replied: “By thinking about it all the time.” Whatever you give your attention to, you also give it power. Where attention goes, energy flows . . . and it grows – good or bad! In other words, the grass is greener wherever you water it most!
When you provide a product or service that was created with deep passion – true authenticity, its potential return is high. It is . . . truth – you can’t deny it. When you love someone with all of your heart and soul, your potential return is also high. When your vision is pure . . . when it’s a win-win for all . . . and when your heart is totally invested, success will be yours!
Conversely, if you create a product or service, or you engage in a relationship that lacks integrity, the potential return is low. You get what you give!
There’s no such reality as “something for nothing.” If you don’t like what you’ve been getting, it’s time to do the work: cleaning up your messes, rewriting your future, and developing your own net worth. The great American writer, poet, naturalist, and early transcendentalist Henry David Thoreau explained it this way: “The cost of a thing is the amount of what I call life which is required to be exchanged for it, immediately or in the long run.”
Creation is the alignment of your desire in thought, word, and action. It was born out of the contrast you’ve been living.
One of the best ways I’ve found to stay true to myself and my dreams is by thinking from the end – that is, thinking about how I want to be remembered. My ex-husband used to tell me that I had a death fantasy. I didn’t. What I had (and still possess) was a deep desire to leave a legacy . . . an important legacy. This is one of my end values. (Remember, the means to an “end.”)
My deep desire enabled me to fast forward to the end of my life and look back. It compelled me to think about the things that mattered most to me, and that takes courage. Not all my friends, family, or partners could understand my values or priorities. They often thought I was too driven, too serious, too focused, too ambitious, too . . . something! But for me, following my passion was natural; my dreaming drove me, and settling for less wasn’t an option. I felt guilty at times for choosing my dreams over my lover’s wants, but it was my truth. Thankfully, I now have a husband who understands me, loves me, and would never make me choose between him and my passions.
The questions that often came up for me were things like:
- How will my life have mattered?
- How will I have impacted others in a positive and significant way?
- Will I have done a great job raising my children, inspiring them to live magnificent and purpose-driven lives? Will they know how loved and special they were?
- Will my husband know how much I loved and appreciated him?
- As I stand before my Maker, how will I feel?
- How will my friends and family remember me?
- Will I have any regrets at the end of my life? If so, how can I clean them up now?
I encourage you to think from the end as well. Ask yourself these or similar questions and see what comes up for you.
I also encourage you to think about the “means”, values that you’ve often dreamed of having. There’s nothing wrong with wanting a beautiful car or a house on the ocean; it becomes a problem only when you value those things more than you value your relationships – more than you value people.
But remember, as you look at what it is that you want most, ask yourself if your personal output equals your hoped for potential input. In other words, are you giving enough? You must determine what you intend to give in return for the things – possessions and feelings – you dream about.
I am living proof that “If you can dream it, you can achieve it!” As a sexually abused teenager who moved out at 15, to a single mother on the brink of bankruptcy, I’ve taken the painful stories of my life and channeled them; always keeping my mind, heart, and spirit on my mark – on the vision for my life.
Before you throw yourself into any new enterprise – be it a relationship or new business – take a pause long enough to ask yourself if it aligns with you – with your dreams, voice, hopes, and needs. Take a pause long enough to see if you really love “it”, regardless of whether “it” loves you.
Today, I encourage you to dream your greatest dream. The catch is that you must not settle for anything less of yourself!